Start your day with these rib cracking jokes
View pictures in App save up to 80% data. 1. That is how u will visit someone and see a dog without chains and they'll be like, "Don't worry, it won't bite u" and I be like, "Come o, are u the dog? Is the dog you? I mean have u been a dog before?
I just hate nonsenses.
2. This morning, I saw a group of people surrounding a bus & shouting, "Give me my
change o!" I rushed & joined them... I collected N850.
3. Imagine marrying an old man for his money.. and you die first.
4. Remove boyfriend from some girls' life, and they cannot even afford tissue paper. Mtcheeeeeeeewww!
5. Being ugly is bad. People will just look at ur face and conclude u are wicked.
6. Imagine on ur wedding day, u call the caterer to know if she's close to the venue. and BOOM! She asks, "Is it today?.
7. Give her a laptop and tell her to type her CV, that's when u will know that this Brazilian hair is on top of coconut.
8. Your boyfriend leaves his phone unlocked with you. Instead of you to quickly transfer money into your account and delete the alert, you started reading his chats with other girls. and you think you have sense.
9. DEPRESSION is for people who have money. Not u my friend. U're just suffering from anger mixed with hunger.
10. When someone dies, people gather and cry bitterly to have him back. but let him mistakenly raise his leg. Omo, coman see temple run na.
11. Parents beating their children with cane are actually disobeying the scriptures. The Bible recommended rod.
12. I just heard my ex was hit by a truck... This world sef!
I just hope nothing happened to the truck oo.
13. And if I've made u smile or laugh, lemme see some comments and reactions and watch how laughter will never cease in ur life.
Disadvantages of smoking
1. Smokers don't grow old because they will die young due to lung damage, as warned by the Ministry of Health.
2. Smokers won't be bitten by a dog simply because when theirl lungs are damaged they have to walk with a stick every time. And dogs fear people with a stick in their hands.
3.Thieves can't break into the house of a smoker at night because smokers are always awake coughing!
Care for your health.
Common English mistakes
Nigeria: Extreme end
Nigeria: Short knicker
Nigeria: Barbing salon
Nigeria: Bending corner
Nigeria: So therefore
American: From now on
Nigeria: From now henceforth
Nigeria: Still yet
American: Turn back
Nigeria: Reverse back
American: In case
Nigeria: Should in case
British: Tell me the reason
American: Tell me why
Nigeria: Tell me the reason why
Nigeria: Return backward
British: Ten pounds each
American: Ten dollars each
Nigeria: Ten Ten Naira each
British: Repeat it
American: Do it again
Nigeria: Repeat it again
British: Resume to school
American: Back to school
Nigeria: Resume back to school
Make I continue?