Best Funny Jokes Of The Day.
1. Laughter is the Best Medicine, But if you Laugh for no Reason, You Need Medicine.
2. man who bed wets went to see a psychiatrist...
PSYCHIATRIST: Does a dream usually precede your bed-wetting?
PSYCHIATRIST: Tell me how it happens.
MAN: A little demon appears to me in my sleep and says, "Hey... Let us pee". Then, I wake up to see the bed wet with my urine.
PSYCHIATRIST: This is what you must do. If the demon comes tonight and tells you "let us pee", just reply him that you have already peed.
The man left and returned the following day with tears streaming down his face.
PSYCHIATRIST: Why are you weeping? Didn't my therapy work?
MAN: You have worsened my case!
PSYCHIATRIST: What? How?
3. woman goes to her doctor who verifies that she is pregnant. This is her first pregnancy. The doctor asks her if she has any questions.
She replies, "Well, I'm a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?"
The doctor answered, "Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it's difficult to describe pain."
"I know, but can't you give me some idea?" she asks.
"Grab your upper lip and pull it out a little..."
"A little more..."
"No. A little more..."
"Yes. Does that hurt?"
"A little bit."
4. woman keeps having the same weird dream, so she goes to her psychologist.
Psychologist: "What is your dream about?"
Woman: "I am being chased by a vampire..."
Psychologist: "So, where are you in this dream?"
Woman: "I am running in a hallway."
Psychologist: "Then what happens?"
Woman: "Well, that's the weird thing. In every single dream, the same thing happens. I always come to a door, but I can't open it. I keep pushing the door and pushing the door, but it won't open!"
Psychologist: "Does the door have any letters on it?"
Psychologist: "And what do these letters spell?"
5. LADY: My husband just swallowed paracetamol tablet by mistake... what should I do?
DOCTOR: Give him a headache now, don't waste the medicine!
6. Meanwhile at the Hospital...
DOCTOR: why did you take your Medicine at 6 am yet I told you 9 am?
PATIENT: I wanted to surprise the Bacteria...
7. Once a man diagnosed with Cancer visited his doctor for the regular checkups, then the conversation below...
MAN: Good day doc.
DOC: Good day sir, here for the check up right?
MAN: Yes Doc!
Soon after the check up began, the doctor started shaking his head pitifully...
MAN: Doc, anything wrong?
DOC: Am sorry, but you only have 5 to go
MAN: 5?! Five what?
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8. guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes off his trousers and washes his hands again.
The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist."
The guy, surprised, says, "Yes... how did you figure that out?"
"Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands."
One thing led to another and they make love.
After they are done, the girl says, "You must be a really good dentist."
The guy, now with a boosted ego says, "Well yes, I'm a good dentist. How did you figure that out?"
"I didn't feel a thing!"